What a day...

So... things work out weird sometimes.  I got the email about the cancellation of the trip from Seoul on Wednesday.  So Wednesday night I emailed the group, and I am expecting a refund.  Thursday I was scrolling thru FB and another group stated that they are also going to Namhae Island.  This group is going to be leaving from Seoul on Friday night, will be doing more active kinds of stuff, and turns out that it's cheaper.  Not surprisingly, I booked it.  The trip has so far been salvaged, but I'm not 100% positive that it's actually going to happen.  Call me a pessimist, but the 'rona seems to be a vengeful bug.  I'm excited for the trip again, even though that Friday will see me trying to sleep on the bus on the way down.  Hopefully I'll be able to catch a few mins of sleep.  I'm really excited because we will be staying with Korean families on the island, so we can have some traditional food and get to know more of the culture.  No green tea fields, but meh... at least I'll get some quality beach time in and the sea kayaking sounds AMAZING!

Otherwise, I'm just dealing with other stuff.  Kids are back and that's nice.  There are certain changes at work that are a pain, but it is what it is.  The scale hasn't really moved lately which has me pretty well bummed out and I'm forced to ask myself if I stay the course or (shudder) add in exercise or something.  I'm also just kind of in a bummed-out place this week.  It's been a week of ups and downs - and I'm not good at being a yo-yo.

 Life can be hard, but at least the flowers are pretty.

In an attempt at 'self-care,' I purchased a face mask from Lush called Rosy Cheeks.  It's supposed to help with the redness on my nose.  It makes me laugh when I wear it, so I figured I'd share with you.  I did have the thought that if I wear a face mask when I'm out and about then all I have to worry about is a sunburn on the top of my nose and my forehead.  LOL.

 Look at me, being all taking-care-of-my-skin and stuff!!

I also went shopping today and you can kinda see the red mark that is still on my shoulder from the backpack and bigger bag that I used to carry home my groceries from Costco.  I'm telling you, friends, be happy you don't have to carry groceries home in a backpack and take a bus.  It's a pain in the shoulders!  

The good news is, I'm stocked on nuts, apples, chocolates for my kids, cookies for my co-workers, chicken boobs to cook for J with, smoked sausages for me, Listerine, and I splurged on a bottle of Baileys Irish Cream.  Then I came home and decided to give in to the weirdest craving I have EVER had (had to go to OK Mart for some ingredients)... for the first time, I'm making tuna salad.  That's right, never really ate it back home, but for some reason I'm CRAVING it here.  I had gotten some tuna in a pouch that I had with my crackers and that was nice, but apparently no, I want the whole shebang with mayo and mustard and celery and I want to eat it with a whole sleeve of Club crackers.  I also got my friend S some red pepper flakes for his pizza and it came at a cost... I'm going to be storing some of the chicken and sausages in his freezer since mine is still kinda full of bagels.  That and I don't want anything going bad before we can eat them.  I also stopped in at Paris Baguette to see if they had the salad that I love (they did) and get some cream bread.  It's like a sweet roll with whipped cream in the middle and almonds on top.  Might sound weird, but MAN they are good.  J asked me the other day what things I would miss about Korea - cream bread is one of them.  

So now I am home on a beautiful Saturday - the sun is shining and it is 82 degrees outside today.  I have successfully had the 'we have food at home' conversation with myself, so I have decided that I will not be venturing into Seoul today.  I will instead do my laundry, make my tuna salad, have it and my chicken salad, have some drinks, and probably end up watching Zombieland Double Tap since it's finally on Netflix.  I might even get wild and watch Train to Busan.  This may also be the day that I finally deep clean my bathroom, but let's not get totally out of hand here.  Anyway, another lazy weekend is planned for me.  I hope all is good for all of you and I'm sending lots of love and hugs from Korea!  MUAH!  :*

I'm all grown up

You know what cracks me up?  When someone finds out just how organized I can be.  Case in point - today I went grocery shopping after work.  I ran into one of my Korean co-workers and he asked what I had to go shopping for.  I thought for a min and then told him that I could just show him my list.  His reaction: "You have a LIST!?"  Leaving me going... "Well, YEAH!"  I need a list, otherwise I'll wander and pick up things I think I want and/or need and then leave, get home, then realize that I forgot a bunch of stuff!  Also, a list is helpful in what I call seek-and-destroy shopping.  Get in, get what you need, and get OUT.  This convo also included "Why not go to X store," "What about Costco," and other comments.  Sigh... I don't like X store since they moved everything around and I can't find anything, Emart usually has what I want/need, and Costco isn't open long enough after work!  Costco is a Saturday trip!  It just reminded me of another Korean co-teacher who was surprised that I would stack my writing notebooks by class so that I could just grab and go and didn't have any mix-and-match issues.  Is this a sign of maturity or an A-type personality or what?!  Lists are useful, you know... otherwise I wouldn't be able to make J the zucchini, bell pepper, mushroom, and chicken pesto that I was planning on.  It would just be zucchini pesto!

Anyway, it was a successful shopping trip.  I took the bus to Emart and then walked home.  I wasn't tired and needed a few small things from OK mart, so I went there too.  Then I came home and put the groceries away, washed my mirrors, cleaned my toilet, poured boiling water down a slow drain, and generally tried to distract myself from the fact that my homesickness reared its ugly head today.  It's a good thing I don't eat on Monday because otherwise I would have gotten a double whopper and fries from Burger King, then chicken cup, a Sprite, and I would have had 2 slices of the cake that H bought.  As it was, I snagged a macaroon to enjoy on Tuesday.  At least I can recognize when I want to emotionally eat.  Oh also, be sure to wash your metal water bottles... I smelled mine today and it was GROSS.  So I also had to get a bottle brush and bring it home to wash.  Ew... just... ew.

Oh, we have 2 more days of online teaching as well.  There was a confirmed case of the 'rona in the building next to ours, so to be safe we're online for Mon and Tues.  It's weird thinking that I've taught the kids online for about 3 months.  I'm adding that to my resume.  Also, I've coined the term "BC - Before Corona" at work and caught a co-worker using it.  I'm officially a trendsetter (tho I won't be including THAT on the resume).

Ugh... and I just got the email that I have been dreading - my trip to Namhae island has been cancelled.  Apparently they didn't get enough people to justify a bus from Seoul, and the bus that they would usually use to get us back isn't running due to the 'rona.  I am... SO BUMMED.  So now I'm trying to figure out other things to do and other places to go.  I really wanted to see the green tea fields and try making new friends but NOOOOOOO.  Now I'm thinking a trip to Busan is most DEF in order... but trying to be at all optimistic right now is NOT working because I just want to be at one with my bummed-ness and curl up with a book and a scotch and let the world burn.  I mean, I'll come back and I'll plan something and it will be fun... I just like leaving all the logistics to someone else sometimes.  I haven't had much luck with organizing things with friends.  Ugh... I want copious amounts of Mexican food, margaritas, and my friends from HOME!!!

Better Help sent me a T-shirt for doing a review of my counselor, so I decided to wear it today.  It's a little tighter than I normally wear, but J assured me that it looks nice.  :)

Also, I showed some of my kids the wonderfulness of cursive and wanted a good example.  So then today, a letter came from Gma.  She sent some articles from home that she thought I'd like.  I haven't read them yet, but I'm saving the envelope to show the kids because she has BEAUTIFUL handwriting.  So thank you to Gma for being able to show my kids what cursive should look like.  (Mine isn't the best... my last name ends up being an S and a squiggle.)

Dinner tonight with J was wonderful - she loved it.  Poor M(C) won't get leftovers... again.  LOL.  Next time I'm thinking vegetarian chili. 

Anyway, that's pretty much all that's going on... some mental stuff that I don't want to discuss here... same old, same old, to be honest.  The kids are back in person, which is fun.  So all is good over across the big blue.  Missing my loves back home, MUAH!  :*

I've been in a mood

One of my favorite things as a metal head is exposing people to new music.  Everyone I work with knows that I tend toward the heavier side of music.  As such, when they come in and hear Rob Zombie, Metallica, or Disturbed, they are not surprised.  However, when I was in a country mood, M(C) had a moment when he came to my room.  S came over one time and I was listening to a mix on Youtube (which is full of pretty random stuff, not gonna lie), and asked what band was playing.  It happened to be Apocalypse Orchestra (kind of heavy, but melodic with pipes), and he was not adverse to them.  On Wednesday J came over for dinner and I was listening to Nightwish.  I got a "I'd even listen to this music" from her.  I then played her some Epica, but that was determined to be too heavy.  Since then I've been on a more symphonic metal kick.  If you are wondering - Kamelot is really great, too... Nightwish, Within Temptation, Delain, and Sirenia also make me happy.  I'm not sure what got me on this kick, but on it I am.  I love the more symphonic and melodic death metal out there.  So looking forward to Metallica's S&M2 when it comes out (as of right now, I can't find it for sale... stupid Corona).

So we are done with online classes again (cross fingers) and the kids are back to coming in.  I friggin' love having them there - and I have gotten to the point where I would adopt one if she needed me to.  She is the cutest thing, speaks English well, and always has a hug for me.  So we are back to having kids in class, life is ok, and I'm looking forward to my first paycheck with 100% of my pay.

 The tree outside my window is looking happy.

 I was feeling kinda saucy that day... so this was the base of my outfit...

 ... and I had this shirt for work.  The kids LOVE my feather earrings, so thanks Linda for getting me on that kick. 

 My lunch that day after my extended fast.  M(C) made the bagel sammich, and it was AWESOME!  I had to laugh at him, tho.  He said next time he needs to be more like me and have a whole spread instead of JUST the sammich.  I told him that when you fast, you take your food seriously! 

Which brings me to this: guys, are you tired of always asking your woman what she wants to eat and having the never-ending run around?  Well, date a woman who fasts!  Chances are she knows what she wants because she's been thinking about it ALL DAY.  Also, if she does ADF it will mean a LOT to her if you know what days she does and does not eat. 

I find my schedule of food easy - but considering how many times I've had to explain it to S and J, I've come to understand that perhaps from the outside it's not so simple.  For those at home - I don't eat on Monday or Thursday, I eat 2 meals on Tuesday and Friday, and one meal on Wednesday, Saturday, and Sunday.  Saturday and Sunday I usually have an eating window of about 6 hours - so I'll have a snack, drink something other than water (usually Sprite or tea), have my dinner, then have dessert.  I have to tell you, on days when I'm not eating and people around me are doing the "What sounds good" convo, it's hard not to be smug cuz I don't have to deal with that.  Hehe.

 This is my dinner from that night - wine and brownie for dessert not pictured.  This week, I cooked every night - it was great.  I'm having leftover chili today, then I'm going to go to the grocery store on Monday (they are closed today) to get stuff to cook for J on Wednesday - I think S and I are going to go to Baby G for dinner on Tue. 

 We had the kids in class on Saturday as our last make-up day.  This is what one student was doodling at break time.  Kids are weird.  But I also love sharks and playing Hangman, so I approve.

 Another student made me a coin purse.  She was folding in class, so I had her put it away until the lesson was over, then she could get it out. 

Isn't it cuuuuute?! 

Another student who was in a class that I was helping with came up and gave me a present for Teacher's Day - a box of German chocolates.  I'm excited to munch on those when I'm in a chocolate mood. 

Here's the worst part of the transition between online and in-person during a pandemic... it's hard to be sure you know the students you think you know.  If they are former students, or if you have only had them in an online class, you can't be 100% sure if you know the student when your experience of them has been limited to a TIINY screen, and/or you can only see half their face.  I feel bad when I don't remember names or can't be SURE that I know a student.  Luckily, they all love the high 5 game, so I can play that with them and not have to worry about names.  Although one student kinda tried pulling my hand down by grabbing and hanging from my arm... he is another one that is just so cute and cheeky.  I was joking with a student who didn't want to do his work on Saturday and called him a monkey... he was either laughing or crying so I had to stop and ask since he was wearing a mask!!  Luckily he was laughing and acted like a monkey the rest of the time - but he also got his work done, so you know, teacher win.  The school also did feed us on Saturday, so that was nice.  Now I know where to get a good chicken sammich.  :)

Anyway, otherwise I'm still a little homesick and may already be counting down the months before I come home.  I've thought about it and I guess I wouldn't be totally opposed to spending a summer in WY if I don't have a job lined up by the time I get back.  The thing is, if I don't get something by the time the snow flies, I may consider coming back to Korea and working in Busan with D for a year or 2.  Then I can cross 'living near a beach' off my list.  I am planning to see some people when I come back, otherwise I'm afraid you all might have to come and see me - and my home state - when I'm home.  It's a beautiful place to visit, you know... and I'd be there... and I'd love to see you!! 

Well, that's all there is from here at the moment.  I mean, there is some more but it's mostly just a rant about what crap the dating world is and quite frankly at this point it feels like I'm beating a dead horse.  As a Christian, is it possible to maintain a low opinion of most of humanity while simultaneously loving them in a weird, Catholic way?  I want to say yes, because there are some people in my life that I love, and yet don't really like.  You know?  Like, for whatever reason, I love them and want nothing but good things for them, but I don't want to spend a whole lot of time with them.  Relationships are WERID, right?!  No wonder one of the romantic things on Parks and Rec was 'I love you and I like you.'  My favorite was 'I kinda hate most things, but no matter how hard I try I can't hate you.' 

That's enough rambling for one Sunday.  Much love to my peoples across the big blue, hugs to those in Korea who read this.  :*  MUAH!

I also love dogs

I love my crazy friends.  My most dog-crazy one has been annoyed that I have TWO cat pillows at home.  So what did she do?  She took a picture of her dog and got it turned into a pillow so now I can cuddle with HER dog whenever I want.  I LOVE IT!!!  Her pup doesn't always want to cuddle, and now I can cuddle her WHENEVER I WANT!  This is by far one of the best things I've ever gotten.  She also sent a fun dress, some chocolate, and chili powder.  So now I can make chili for S on Tuesday and I'm making stir fry for J on Wednesday.  I also made brownies over the weekend and gave those away to M(C), and J who shared them with A and M(H).  Tip - when making things in a toaster oven, cut the cooking time by about 10 mins... sigh... brownies attempt #2 will be sometime soon, I'm sure.

The teaching online continues... and it is what it is.  I am looking forward to being able to have the kids back in class.  I had to laugh at one of them today though.  The lesson was about volunteering for Habitat for Humanity and I mentioned that I've done that before.  One of my favorite students asked me how it was that I've done all these things - I know sign language, I volunteered for Habitat, I've been all these places - and I realized I have had a pretty awesome life.  My favorite substitute teacher in school was the lady who had been everywhere and seen everything and I think to my students, that's me.  It's funny... I hardly ever see my life thru other's eyes, but when I do it's kind of striking.  My friend S also stopped in and told me that one of my old students used me in a sentence.  The chunk was 'as flat as a pancake' and her sentence was 'K Teacher will be flat as a pancake if Amanda Teacher fell on him.'  We got a pretty good giggle about it.  In the meantime, I'm more than slightly nervous about coming home in March and trying to find a job... so prayers about that would be extremely appreciated.

Anyway, life continues... no plans for the weekend, though I may have to work on Sat, but we don't know for sure yet.  I keep reminding myself that Korea is teaching me how to take life as it comes.  It's not totally helpful, but it's a good thought.  Much love to all, MUAH! :*

Weekends are tough

Here's the thing: during the week I understand that there is just a lot that is out of my control.  However, no matter what happens regarding the classes, work stuffs, etc, I know the shape that my week will take.  Then comes the weekend.  In the before times... BC... before Corona, I could go to Seoul on the weekend and wander around, get some food, have some fun, maybe meet people, maybe have a date, basically there were options for my weekends.  Now with the Revenge of the 'Rona going on, I feel like my best bet will be to stay home.  The thing is, my home is lonely.  I have books, I have Netflix, I have food, I won't be bored, but I will be alone.  I usually cherish my solitude, but I'm thinking that this may be one of those too-much-of-a-good-thing scenarios.  So what are my options?  Get back on Bumble for the distraction it offers and hope for some kind of connection?  Hang out with my friends in relationships and solidify my status of third wheel?  Realize that I'm just feeling lonely and hormonal, so plan a weekend of pampering myself to help myself feel better?  You know what I'd love to do?  I'd love to get in my car and just drive around while listening to music for a while.  Roll the windows down, turn the radio up, and work through all my emotional crap.  God I miss that.

Back in TX when I felt like this I could go and spend the weekend with a friend.  With all that's going on at the moment, my job doesn't want me to leave Dongtan... so... yeah... guess no Busan trip in the future.  I wonder if the Namhae trip will be cancelled.  Just like that, we are plunged back into the sea of uncertainty after being offered a glimpse of life as 'normal.'  No wonder I'm super bummed right now.  I've found myself on Amazon way too much looking at sundresses (no worries, the shipping is more than the dress in most cases), and the only reason I haven't ordered more from Holy Clothing is that I'm still waiting on the final pieces of my last order (don't get me started), so I'll go to the grocery store and call that my retail therapy.  I think I'll make nachos on Saturday... maybe make a taco salad... EAT ALL THE THINGS!

So yeah, I'm super bummed right now, friends.  It's partly hormonal, partly being lonely, and partly being homesick.

Now that the weekend has arrived, it's ok.  I got up this AM and had a cold brew while waiting for my kettle to boil so that I can actually make some hot coffee.  I started a load of laundry, and I'm thinking of going to a coffee shop with my journal later to be around others.  I may also take a blanket to the laundromat since I spilled garlic butter on it last week (I know, I know, but when you don't have a table/chairs, you eat sitting on your bed).  I'll probably read today, maybe watch something... either way I'm again spending the day with me.  It's ok, I mean, I like me.  I just miss other people that I also like, you know?  Eh, to ensure you know that I'm ok, I decided to turn my Saturday into a picture project.  So here is my Saturday thru the lens... of the phone :)

 Snuggling with Soju.

The Elixir of LIFE!!!

 Doing laundry...

 My drying rack...

The full drying rack.

 I get to play artist, I borrow a beret from S.

 Look at my art!  Thanks, S.

 Before...

 After!  How cute!

 I wasn't done painting yet, so I painted my nails.

 Not sparkly enough...

Better.

 My date for the day...

 or this one... spoiler alert... it ended up being the first one.

I am the BEST at snacking.  For those who are wondering, I also ended up having the leftover pizza from last night, some cookies, some wine, and more snackies.  Hehehe.

So all in all, it was a good day.  I got stuff done, I was lazy, and now I have a cute little painting of BOSS!

Culinary Adventures

So we went back to online classes for a couple days due to the resurgence of the 'Rona.  The good news is that we're not back to 100% online, which is nice.  Don't worry everyone, I'm wearing my mask when I'm around people, I'm washing my hands like I used to work at a hospital (cuz you know, I did), I'm the Queen of opening doors with my elbows (and ready for the Star Trek slide-y doors).  In the meantime it's not like this is going to cramp my social life cuz... yeah... I don't really have what would be called a 'social life.'  I do have to say, I'm excited that I have the extended editions of Lord of the Rings cuz that means I can HERMIT in STYLE!  Muah ha ha ha haaaaaaaa!!

In other news, the Indian food place that J and I have been going to disappointed her SO MUCH last time that I am hereby cooking for us on Wednesday nights for the future.  She will be providing dessert.  Well yesterday, she got us a grape cake from Paris Baguette.  I made chicken, mushroom, and zuchini pasta with marinara sauce (not my best, but it was ok).  We had dinner, then cut into the cake, tried the cake, it took me a while to place the taste (grape soda is closest) and J was... horrified.

 The following pix are posted with permission from J. ;)

I had to chronicle the experience because... I mean, it was so funny!!!  As usual, J and I had a wonderful chat and basically solved everyone's problems, but we are not going to tell anyone what we've determined in order to let things sort themselves out.  MUAH HA HA HA HAAAA.  Also in order to cleanse our palettes of the sub-par dessert, I gave J a chocolate chip cookie and I had some jalapeno dark chocolate from S.  SO GOOD!  I think next week will be chicken teriyaki stir fry. 

Since we don't have students right now, our Saturday OT was pushed back to next week.  That means there is supposed to be a rainy Saturday in my future, everyone is being advised to stay home and not travel, so I'm thinking it's the perfect opportunity for some extended edition LOTR goodness.  It's funny, on the one hand I'm a little lonely on the weekends.  On the other hand, I'd want to hang out with someone who would also want to watch what I do, who liked my food, and who didn't mind hanging out in PJ's.  Basically as my sister put it - "You want YOUR people."  Yep, I want my TX peeps and my WY peeps and my KS peeps and my WA peeps and, and, and, and.  Holy crap, if I actually listed all the states with 'my' peeps in them we'd end up with... ok I want my US peeps!!!  God I miss home.  I haven't even been able to go on base for the little slice of home that it felt like.  Sigh.

Tonight I'm going to the grocery store to stock up for the rainy weekend.  I see lots of cheese and crackers in my future... maybe some nachos... ooooo nachos.  MUAH HA HA HA HAAAAA.  Much love in the midst of the madness, missing all of you SO FRIGGIN' MUCH!  Socially distanced and masked hugs for ALL!!!!  MUAH! :*

Revenge of the 'Rona

Sigh... we hope for normal, but when it all goes pear-shaped again it seems that we swing farther in the other direction.  The thing is, I get it.  People are still worried and businesses want to be able to reassure their clients/customers that they are doing all they can.  That being said, it sucks to live with.  Part of me knows that being annoyed isn't going to do anything but burn energy and leave me exhausted... another part is SUPER ANNOYED!  I keep seeing a meme that says "I want to go back to social distancing on my own terms" and man, I FEEL THAT!  How long until I can own my own island... right.

Other than that, things are good.  I did get my hair cut this weekend, and it looks good.  Kinda reminds me a bit of Sam Eliot with a side bang (hehehe). 

I mean, Jay had made sure to give me the windswept look after the cut, but it's back to my usual now.  Probably good that it's not longer... I'd be tearing it out, I'm pretty sure. 

Anyway, not much to report.  I've been working, the Saturday hours went well, I totally love a few of my kids, others are more challenging, but can still be fun.  I never know when to believe that a kid can't see and needs to move closer to the front... I mean, I want to believe them but some can be quite cheeky.  I kinda want to put my hair into a mohawk... just need some Elmer's glue... hehehe. 

WHERE IS A MOSH PIT WHEN I NEED ONE?!  I will settle for a punching bag... ugh. 

On a different note, I got the giggles thinking of all my 'Mom's' across the country.  I've both adopted and been adopted by so many people!!  So a belated Happy Mother's Day to my actual Momma and all of my adopted Moms!  I love you all and I miss you SO FRIGGIN' MUCH and I can't wait to come home next year.

Boxes are not for people

I've been thinking a lot (usually when I can't sleep) about why people will put other people into "boxes" to make them feel better.  That took me down the reality-is-perception rabbit hole and I've concluded that people will tend toward simplifying other people in order to make them more easy to deal with.  Case in point - my friend J is a small, adorable, ball of friggin' sunshine.  She can also curse when she wants to, tell a bawdy joke with the best of us, and hold some of the most intelligent conversations on an extremely wide range of topics.  The only time I've seen her almost raging is when she's had to deal with someone who had her in a certain box in their head, then she's done something to break the box, and they can't handle it so they fall back on 'You've changed.'  I actually had a really fun convo with one person about that where I pointed out that she had not changed, but his perception of her had changed and that's what he was struggling with.  He could handle her as long as she stayed in his boxed perception of her - when she broke the box, he was left drifting.  I've told her multiple times to keep being who she is and not let other people's hangups get her down.  I've seen what happens when someone tries to be someone they are not in order to not rock the boat - rocking the boat is more fun and causes WAY less stress... at least for the boat-rocker.  Hehe.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm all for compartmentalizing my life.  It generally takes a LONG time for me to bring my friends together in any kind of social setting and if I ever do start dating, it's going to be at least 6 mo or so before he meets ANYONE I know and love because by that point I should know if he's a decent guy and I don't want to waste anyone's time (except my own, if the mood strikes).  I think there is difference between compartmentalizing (in my case that means mostly hanging out with people one-on-one, until I know who will vibe with whom), and attempting to make someone fit into the preconceived (or first-conceived) box in which you'd like to put them.  If there's one thing I've found in my life it's that people are way more complex than we often give them credit for.  The more you get to know someone, the more comfortable they are around you, the more they know if they can truly be themselves around you.  So to those who know me - LOVE YOU!!!  Thanks for taking a chance on me, or adopting me, or letting me latch on to you and being ok with me adopting you.  :)

The kids are back.  I had my first full day with students on Monday.  I can see where there will be at least 2 classes that are going to be hard to manage, but I'm sure we'll get there.  My favorite class is going to remain my favorite class - they asked what my Dr. Seuss quote meant and when I said it was from Dr. Seuss my favorite little smarty pants light up and went "DR SEUSS!"  Then they read the one poster that I have in cursive and I showed them how to write that way and it kind of blew their minds.  It was SUCH a fun class and the only one that I accidentally let out a little late.  Otherwise I was able to do my overacting bit for a couple classes and I'm sure that I'll be using my "Amanda Teacher is die" in the near future.  Really guys, it's the kids that make this job fun.  I had one trying to say 'shirt' and all I could hear was 'shoot' so I wrote the 2 words on the board and underlined the differences.  The whole class was laughing about it, and I turned it into a lesson on the importance of vowel sounds and 'r' sounds.  My Tuesday-Thursday classes will be interesting.  Only 5 kids came to one class on Tuesday, but the other one was full.  Both are super quiet classes, so that's going to be... interesting. 

OH before I forget - when we were in Seoul the other day we saw this guy:

That's right - he was taking his GUINEA PIG for a ride on little cart.  He took it out and put it in a bag for a bit, then apparently decided he was not taking the bus that day, but the guinzu back on the cart and carried on across the street.  It was the funniest/cutest thing I have EVER seen!!

Anyway, yesterday was Cinco De Mayo, and because we don't have any decent Mexican food places around here, S and I went to Baby Guinness for Mexi-fries, quesadillas, and drinks.  They did have margaritas, but the tequila sunrises looked particularly yummy.

Feeding the soul

It's funny... the soul is often treated a lot like the body.  We don't generally think about it until it's quite obvious something is wrong.  My friend back in MD reminded me in the depths of my despair that my soul needed to be fed.  I'd become bad at going to to Mass, I knew I needed confession but didn't want to get up early to go to Seoul.  You know, the last time my mental health had deteriorated to the point where I wanted death, going to Mass gave me the hope I needed to carry on.  Not surprising that this time it took a virtual Catholic conference, several talks with fellow Catholics, and the eventual realization that the love of God isn't meant to be understood.  I know how bad I screw up, constantly!  To think that the creator of the universe still loves me, still wants me, and is still happy that he made me - truly boggles the mind.  However, the mind is not where we need to accept that love.  Acceptance comes from the heart, and now I find myself wanting to fall in love with God.  How does one go about doing that?  Well, reading the Gospels to get to know Jesus would be a good start, praying, going to Mass every week, going to confession more often than once every 6 mo or so, and by loving what God loves - that's right, loving my fellow humans.  There's the catch!

I struggle with people, as you well know by now.  I mean, I know you can love someone without really liking them.  To me, that means not making their life any worse just because you're not a fan of them.  I may not like someone, but I'm not going to go out of my way to make them miserable.  Maybe that's not totally what Jesus meant by "love your neighbor as yourself," but it's sometimes the best I can do.  I don't like gossiping about people because I know EXACTLY how that feels and I refuse to be a part of it.  I still hate knowing that I'm a topic of other people's convos - unless it's family discussing how much they love/are proud of me.  :D  Anyway, how do you show the love of God to people who make you want to run a cheese grater on your forehead rather than talk to them?

Good new is that we will have the kids back on Monday.  OK news is that we will have the kids back on Monday.  I'm definitely going to keep my counselor for May to make sure that I can handle the kids in the classroom.  Or give myself some new coping mechanisms for dealing with the lack of respect that I know I'm going to have to deal with.  I do like talking with her - tho on Wed we had to push back our session because I cooked for J and I'm still getting used to cooking in a toaster oven.  I know what to do differently next time, that's for sure!  LOL.

Minor setback that I want to blow out of proportion: we have to work 2 Saturdays in May.  Now, I'm going to sound like a spoiled, bratty child and my only excuse is that I'm PMS-ing so BACK OFF!  I'm bummed because I was starting to look forward to having nice weather weekends to myself.  I was going to go to Seoul on the 9th and check out Seoul Forest, wander along the Han river, find somewhere yummy for food - it was going to be a great day of Mandi introverting in public.  Now- NADA.  The weather is finally nice, I could work on my tan, but NOOOOO, now I have to work.  We have about 2 months of nice weather before we hit the "holy crap, that's right this is a peninsula" humidity.  Part of me KNOWS this is just PMS (cycle-tracking apps are AMAZING, mine is Flo), because I generally get bitchy around this time (see also: another reason for my good mood this week).  We have to wear masks when the kids are here, and they do too.  (Silver lining - saving on lipstick.) We are also supposed to try to make sure that they are not touching each other too much and riddle me how we are supposed to control THAT?!  So yeah, I'm bummed... it's a minor inconvenience but the way I'm feeling right now I want to get on a boat, throw my passport in the sea, and go figure out how to live on a desert island... or get a job working as a bartender at some skeezy resort.

So M(C) reminded me why we are having to work on 2 Saturdays, and it's a legit reason.  We had been expecting this last month, but the kids weren't back yet.  After talking with him about it, the inner bitch was mollified.  Then I had my pizza, wine, and movie night and the funniest thing happened.  I was in my laundry room and I saw a guy below my window come over, look left, look right, and take a wiz.  I kept the giggles in until he walked away, but MAN that was tough.  LOL.  The important thing is that the inner bitch has been mollified - apparently my PMS manifests as either me being overly emotional or super bitchy.  Good to know, really.

Anyway, I'm in a good mood again.  Sunday should be a good day of confession, Mass, shopping, margaritas, and making brownies.  It's gonna be a long day, but a good one, I'm sure.

Rockin' the RTL shirt today.  It used to be too tight... now it's almost too big.  Hehehe!!!  Don't worry, it's still coming home with me.  I still need my band shirts, you know.

So the plan didn't work.  There were no confessions, no Mass in English at the Cathedral.  So we got coffee, J went home, M(H) and I went to Gangnam where we had lunch, looked at a couple of book stores, and stopped in at Lush.  Then she went off with some friends to the Han river and I went home.

 I like this... there were a LOT of wine and beer places in Gangnam, but I thought this one would be good for a FB cover pic.

 Anyone else remember these books?!?  Finding this at a used book store in Korea made me so happy.

 I didn't get Bunnicula, but I did get this one.  Figured J and I would get a kick out of it.

 Cheese mountain pasta at a place called Brotherhood Kitchen or something along those lines.  Do you see ANY pasta in that MOUND OF CHEESE?

 This was funny.  We went to a place called Double Trouble to have sandwiches and fries.

M(H) got a pulled pork and mac and cheese sandwich, I got the bacon guacamole sandwich.  What you don't see on mine is the fried egg and carmelized onions.  Frankly, could have done without the onions.

 The pulled pork and yes, that's mac and cheese in the sandwich.  It was good, I now know where to go for my pulled pork.

 We went downstairs to Laundry Pizza to eat.  So I assume this used to be a laundromat that became a pizzaria.

 Isn't it cuuuute?!

 When walking around we found this efficient use of space in a place where it's at a premium.

 We also found the most 2020 thing ever - that's right everyone - this is an abandoned 2020 planner.  I kinda want to submit this pic as high art.  I could call it "A year, abandoned in May."

 The scariest Statue of Liberty EVER.

 Mosaics outside of the building that had our last bookstore in the basement.

 I like the colors.

 And this one... I couldn't resist - doesn't that pup just look BRUTAL?!  Reminds me of some of my metalheads back home.  LOL

Anways, much love to all, stay healthy, big hugs, and MUAH!  :*