Wedding Planning

As J and I start planning things, and others chime in with opinions I've been wondering something. Is having no pre-conceived notions of what I want a good thing or a bad thing? I mean, I've imagined aspects of my life, but my wedding was never one of them. I always imagined living in an apartment wih a roomie like in "friends." I imagined a good paying job so I could afford to travel. I still sometimes picture my dream car, but my wedding? Nah. I think one time back forever ago I was talking to someone and said something about what I'd like for my wedding and they asked "what if the groom doesn't want that?" Suddenly I realized that if I was getting married, I'd have to take a whole other person's ideas and assimilate them into my own. Or I could just not worry about anything wedding related until I had a fiancé. Guess which one I decided would be better? So when J brings up ideas, I agree if I like them. If I don't then he gets a "weeeeeell" or "how about, instead of that..." My man likes to do things cuz he finds them funny, which is great, but does mean I veto some of his more outlandish (and perhaps not TOTALLY wanted) ideas. Honestly, it's been fun. Between the 2 of us, we will have a wedding and reception that reflects who we are, what we like, and celebrates the start of our lives together. 😁 it's gonna be great. I friggin love that man. 

A lot goes into a Catholic wedding, and I am sooooo grateful that he is willing to go thru the process with me. From what I remember when J and D were going thru it, there's some interesting stuff. Poor man is going to have to go thru all the NFP classes... human bodies are gross!! Lol. I think I'll feel better about the date once we meet with the priest and get their timeline, since all preparations will start with that. Gotta get some paperwork first tho... patience, I must have some patience!!!

We ended up hanging out at his place after we had lunch with his mom and went to At Home for clearanced Halloween stuff. So I tried to get really good pix of Ace.

 He does NOT like bubbles. Poor thing was slightly traumatized.

I think he forgave me, tho.

I'm very grateful that J didn't mind going shopping with me looking for Halloween stuff... we actually ended up with a LOT more than I anticipated. 

New glasses in their boxes, old ones from last year on display. 😁

Couldn't resist the mug, the ghostie is actually from Kroger.

J needs his own cushion. 

Hand towels, new soap dispenser to match the one I got last year, a wine tumbler for J and my own kitty cat!

The new additions look great with the old ones. 😁

My spooky shelf.

I cooked on Saturday before we went to the place we are planning in having our reception at. It was sooooooo good. 

Hot italian sausage stuffed spaghetti squash with bread. 😋

We still need to figure out a photographer, meet with the priest (once the paperwork arrives), start our prep, and figure out save the dates and invitations. 😁 We also need to figure out what J is going to wear. Hehehe. We did go check out the venue we are thinking of for the reception. I think it's gonna be fun! So we'll have to meet with the lady who runs all of that, too. So little time, so much to do!

Sunday I got up and was super productive! I chopped, sautéed, and simmered my way to delicious chili 😋 This evening my older sis is coming into town, so J and I are planning to meet up with her for dinner. Should be a good time 😁

Ingredients...

into chili!!! Thank goodness I remembered that I got a deeper chili pot. This would not fit in my usual sauce pot. Lol. Sooooo much yum. The yellow is butternut squash, btw.

Now I get to be lazy until I go to pet smart to pick up some stuff for my sister's pupper, then go to meet up with her. Leftovers for lunch all week, and bfast sammiches for dinner 😁

Good Times with Good Friends

My man has told me many times that he is a good cook. This weekend he finally had the opportunity to show me. I can confirm, 100% that the man can cook and also he mixes a DARN good drink with syrups he made himself!

J cooked peanut noodles with veg and tofu on Thursday. The drink is a hibiscus margarita made with hibiscus infused simple syrup.

My new favorite margarita. 21 seeds Cucumber jalapeño tequila, simple syrup, and fresh squeezed lime juice. Sooooo good.

On Friday we ended up going to Costco with his mom and nephew, then we went to eat at Lazy Dog. He had the PB&J burger, and I had the ahi tuna road trip bowl.

Again.. sooo good!! 

We wandered around World Market for a bit and then we went to check on his kitty before we came back to my place. Well.. his kitty now has a middle name.... Judas... because he ran past J to come and love on me! LOL... double betrayal because I may have mentioned heading straight to my place to avoid the rain that was threatening. Oops.

On Saturday A came into town and we went to Fort Brewery to have food and drinks, as it's pupper friendly.

Whipped feta dip with pita and veg.

We all got different pizzas and shared. Mine is the zeppelin. And I had the zeppelin beer to go with it. 

A had the pesto with the balsamic reduction, and J got the breakfast pizza. All of them were amazing, but I think A's was the best.

It was soooo nice. We had a great time. 

So Sunday A and I went over to Arlington and drove past the church, then we met J for lunch at Tipsy Oak and we intended to walk around Arlington but the weather didn't want to cooperate. We ended up heading home when it started raining a bit. So A took off toward home and I changed into my fleece pj pants and prepared for the week. It was a lovely weekend with 2 of my favorite people. 😁 now on to the cold work week! Hope all my readers are comfy and warm. Much love to all 😘 MUAH!

Next steps

I feel like I need to clear something up. Neither J's family nor my family are presuring us to have a Catholic wedding. It's important to me to have a Catholic wedding, and he agreed to it. We have been joking about making it a super traditional all-sung Latin lass that we estimated would be about 4 hrs long. That's just a joke. In reality we will meet with the priest and go from there. There's a little impish part of me that wants a full Mass just to make my sisters have to sit thru one. I realize that's not really a good reason, but it makes me giggle because I too can be a pain. (And frankly, it would be nice for them to do this ONE thing for me.)

We have discussed other things wedding related between ourselves and I will let you all know that it won't be a super traditional wedding or reception. We are planning something very much in line with our personalities and neither of us really gives a hoot about most wedding traditions. He suggested calling my co-matrons of honor my "ladies of power" and that is TOTALLY how they will be referred to from here on out.

We had a preliminary meeting with the church on Friday where they took down our info so they can (I guess) track down our records. They also gave us a run down on what to expect and I think they'll be good to work with. The priest is father maul, and the star wars geeks in us are loving it. 

Pretty garden area for pictures.

They have a school and this cracked both of us up.

After the meeting we had lunch at flying fish and we won an extra shrimp in our fried pickles!!! Hehe

I love their salmon salad. The prices are a bit $$ but they also don't skimp!

He cooked for me this weekend and also decided to perfect a couple of drinks. He made us PB&J old fashioneds and caramel apple cider with boozy whipped cream. They were both delicious but I ended the night with a splitting headache. I Googled and it turns out both the Screwball whiskey and the caramel smirnoff vodka are made with corn. I guess I don't eat enough chips and salsa to develop headaches like that but if something is made 100% with it, I'm screwed. This makes sense because I ended up with a headache after the engagement party as well, and D was making us old fashioneds. So, lesson learned. Your gal is sticking to tequila. The quesadillas he made were AWESOME!!! 

But look how pretty!!! 

So it was a chill weekend full of food, drink, cuddles, watching TV, and planning wedding stuffs. My ladies of power accepted the positions, which is great and we are shooting for our wedding in about 6 months. I know the timeline is a bit crunched, but I think we can do it. The last big things on my list are photographer and hair/makeup people. 😁 We are keeping it very small, mostly family. My friend A offered to be the driver for some of my family who aren't great at city driving. My man says Arlington isn't city driving and I call shenanigans on it. All DFW is city driving and you can't convince me otherwise.

So we are moving forward with planning, I just realized I need to make our 6 month timeline. Turns out Google is our best friend. Did you know we are supposed to buy each other's rings?? And he's allergic to some metals so we need to see what he can and can't tolerate. Tho let's be honest, mostly we'll wear the silicone rings that are so popular... my sharkie sometimes catches things 🤣. 

Being Engaged

Warning: SUPER gushy post about my incredible fiancé and how much I love him, how good we are together, and various such related things. You may develop a brain cavity due to all the sweetness in this post. Read at your own risk.

Well, now that everyone officially knows I gotta say, it's fun being engaged. I'm getting questions about the significance of the shark, disbelief that this is my FIRST wedding, so many unsolicited opinions on EVERYTHING wedding related, and a lot of congratulations. It's funny, I once wondered why we offer congrats to people who are in a relationship or taking big steps in their established relationship. I didn't think it was such a big deal, right? I mean, people get married every day... some do it multiple times in their lives. Are "congrats" really necessary? Now I know the answer to that is a resounding YES! I'm happily collecting all the congrats people want to give me! It took me bloody YEARS to find this man! I waded thru the festering cesspool of online dating, fighting off the one-night-standers, the want-a-mothers, the you're-good-enough-for-nowers, being ghosted, zombied, and otherwise toyed with, swiping, fading, dating, losing interest, boiling hot one min then cool as a Wyoming February the next. I fumbled thru Bumble, tested the waters of Facebook dating, and even tried hinge- the app "designed to be deleted" from the makers of match.com. I had nearly given up hope of finding someone who would accept me for who I am, who wouldn't try to change me, who I could trust and love and build a life with. As a last-ditch effort, i downloaded 'coffee meets bagel,' my last effort before either paying for a dating service or going and adopting 3 cats! Then I found my unicorn... my cat dad, diesel mechanic, fiat driving, loki-esque, cheeky, adorable, handsome, considerate, amazing man. I really suspected such a man was a myth. But no, he is real and he chose me and I chose him and we shall be together for forever and a day. 

For all that, I totally blank when someone says "so tell me about this guy!" Like... ok, he's 5'10" ish, apache, has amazing hair thats going salt and pepper, brown eyes that look into my soul, an adorable cheeky grin, sense of humor as twisted as mine... but I never think of it in the moment! Anyway, he's amazing and I'm gonna keep him.

Now the fun one. "This is your FIRST wedding!? How OLD are you??" Yep, I made it almost 4 decades before finding someone to marry. I had other stuff to do! I had jobs, I traveled to Europe, I taught in South Korea, I built amazing friendships, i healed from a lot of man-related trauma, I dealt with a lot of my issues and problems, and I focused on becoming the best ME I can be. The healing process took a while because when I would try to date I was grateful for any guy who showed interest and that wasn't healthy, so I'd end up hurt again and the cycle continued. I decided not to date until I was ready to get married and to date with that end in mind. It took me a while to find my man, but on the way I was honest and upfront about my intentions, my interest, and my expectations. I learned to be honest with myself and the guy I was dating. If they weren't honest with me, well, that's on them. I (tried not to) take it personally and just moved on. 

The amazing thing about finding the right man is that all the things I was insecure about before are things that no longer matter. I can be myself around him. I can be moody, happy, goofy, hyper, calm, loud, semi-obnoxious, super clingy, kissey, jokey, serious, a little romantical... whatever and he doesn't mind. He's sooooo chill, it's almost scary at times. We complement each other very well. Every day I spend with him is the best day. Even if we are just being goblins at home. It's awesome. He feels like home. 

Bite side 

Other side

On to the weekend. It was so nice to see J&D at our favorite Mexican place on Thursday night. We split a guacamole and an order of brisket quesadillas and we all enjoyed some drinks. J and I went for their frozen margaritas and D got one of the BEST mojitos I've tasted. We got to dish and chat and it was a lot of fun. We exchanged gifts as well, and they got to see the new car.

Hehe... she got this for me back in July 😁🐙💀

Friday night was date night. We had dinner at a Mexican place in oak cliff (near downtown dallas) and then went to candlelight (a concert of horror movie songs) and decided to go to Plano for dessert. 

Creepy sculptures in Plano. Turns out these creep my fella out like CRAZY.

Saturday we met up with his friends for lunch at a rotating sushi place, and then we went to hang out and they threw us an engagement party!

C&D were lovely hosts, S is sweet as ever, and I met E who was also super awesome. It was a nice day. We ended with Velvet taco and wandering around Barnes and noble. 😁

Sunday we met back up with J&D for brunch, which was lovely. We then went to Southlake so that I could drop by Lush for more shampoo. Turns out that Southlake was having their oktoberfest this weekend! So we wandered around oktoberfest for a bit and then ended up back in my place. After a super busy weekend we got into pjs and watched Little Shop of Horrors. It was a busy yet lovely weekend.

We be cute 😁

So thats what we've been up to. Since this weekend was so busy, we'll be goblin-ing next weekend. Hehe. Much love, friends and family.

Everything at once

As you know, the stink bug died on Sept 21. This left me vehicle-less, so i asked to work from home until i knew what was going on. By Sept 25 i knew it was toast, so i ordered a car via carvana cuz you know, they deliver. On Sept 27 I took possession of the Chevy cruze. On Sept 28 I realized that the Cruze didn't have cruise control, so I ordered a Ford Focus on Sept 29. On Oct 2 I took possession of the Ford focus and returned the Chevy cruze. I will keep the Focus for a while, I think, as I don't want to contact my insurance company again, and my time to return the Focus ends on Oct 9, and i don't want to abuse my work from home privileges. Now, on Sept 29 I squared with the shop and cleaned out the kia. I also accepted the offer from CarVio to purchase the Kia, as they were offering the most $. They said their towing co would call, which they did, on Sept 30. I was told they would be able to tow it possibly on Sept 30, but otherwise it would be Oct 2 or Oct 3 before they could pick it up. The tow truck driver would call when he was an hour away, so I could meet him at the car. So, I worked from home on Monday and Tuesday so I could be close when the guy called. He called at 130 on Tuesday and said he was 30 mins away. I got to the shop at 2 and he was already there... one hour, my butt. I signed the title, he gave me the check, and that was that. So Wednesday and Thursday this week were my only real "normal" work days.

I used the car vending machine... it was sooo cool!!

Now, I had interviewed for a promotion on Sept 5. I was told they had another interview but that they would know by the following week. Well, our HR lady went on vacation and didn't get back until the 18th. Also, the decision makers were out at a conference the week of the 11-14th, so I had no chance to follow up. I emailed on Monday the 18th to see about a follow up, and was told they would discuss and let me know. I heard nothing until Thursday the 28th when I was able to talk to HR who confirmed the rumor that their other interview went really well and they were going to offer the job to this other person. I was told it was a hard decision and that I'm an asset to the company, so they wanted to keep me and give me a raise. It took until Oct 5 to find out what the raise would be... and i learned this via text after working hours. A month... it took a full 30 days to find out and resolve my status at work. So for those counting stress, we had work uncertainty coupled with car dying, buying, swapping, and selling.

Just a random funny.

Not all of the current stress has been bad stress. On Sept 23 after Oktoberfest J asked me to marry him and I said yes! We spent a lovely weekend together and then he had to work the next 11 days straight, so outside of running him food (saw him for 30 mins on Oct 1) we had not seen each other for 11 long, stinking days. During which time I definitely could have used a lot of hugs and cuddles. I didn't post anything for boyfriend day cuz... you know... he's my fiance now. 😁 So thats work uncertainty, car crap, and not being able to get comforting hugs from my fiance. Three very big stressors, coupled with being unable to hit gym goals due to gym being across from work and me working from home. Disappointment before euphoria and then more disappointments piled on. Life really can sometimes kick you in the teeth. 

Yes, it's a tiny sharkie. He says he knew i was the one on our Houston trip to see the shark exhibit. And yes, there is a bite taken out of the band, too. He did a GREAT job finding me something super out of the ordinary. 😃 I think we can expect more of these sorts of things as we plan our wedding. The few things we know for sure: guest list will be small, wedding is Catholic, and I'm not wearing traditional white. 

So now all the uncertainty has been resolved, my fiance has been released from his job servitude (working 11 days straight... poor, exhausted man), and we were able to get his family together and tell them the good news. That went well, and we spent most of this weekend just relaxing and enjoying each other's company. We were both sooooo stressed the last couple weeks, it's been nice to just BE. With everything else going on, knowing we've got each other's backs is... weird and wonderful. It actually has happened... I found my person that I want to spend the rest of my life with. 😁👩🏼‍❤️‍👨🏽💍