Struggling with self care... but had a good weekend away!

There's a lot of things I'm trying to unlearn. One of them has to do with taking care of myself. I often refer to myself as a recovering people pleaser. It took me AGES to learn that I can, in fact, say "no" to someone when I don't want to do something or go somewhere. I've gotten better at recognizing insincere invitations, obligatory invites, and awkward asks. I still sometimes feel a twinge of guilt when I have to tell someone "no" because something is out of my current scope of ability due to financial stress, social overstimulation, introverted exhaustion, or simply because it's overreaching the boundaries of my perception of our friendship. It's going to be a lifelong struggle, I know, because a lot of these patterns of behavior are well ingrained. Another well ingrained pattern is not spending money on myself if its "frivolous" spending. 

For my Bachelorette party we went to a day spa. We got massages, swam in pools, sweated in saunas, and had yummy drinks. Then we got manicures and pedicures, and ended the day at our favorite mexican place.  That, to me, was a day of decadence. Is it no surprise then that when I booked myself a massage I felt cheeky as hell. Journaling dates with myself are fine, because they are cheap. Less than $20 generally. A fancy coffee and a muffin or bagel is all it takes. But a massage. Those are more expensive! I'm splurging on myself... a massage AND a haircut. Granted they are both a week apart, but still! Look at me go! 

Anyway, enough about me. We had a fun time this weekend. It's near someone's bday, so I thought a weekend out of town would be nice. Turns out, I really enjoy planning fun things for people I love. First things first, i got up early on Friday and went to the social security office to change my name. Its officially hyphenated, as far as the gov is concerned! After that, we headed south and stopped in West for sausage rolls and kolaches, then Waco for coffee and and art exhibit. Drove down to Lockhart for some BBQ lunch/dinner, and then to New Braunfels to stay at the condo. We got some beers and rested, watching some TV until sleepy time.

First stop in Waco

For some reason, it never occurred to me that these book covers were actual paintings!! It still blows my mind.

The other exhibit was the art of Kathy Kolowitz, who was a German artist who lived 1867-1945. Very sobering work, a lot of which centered around how mothers try to shield their children from death. Extremely moving.

Real TX BBQ. Also a trip down memory lane for the hubbster. 😁

My fav beer of the evening. It was such a cute little store. I ALMOST got myself some little cigars, but I didn't. No need to open that door again. 

Next day we woke up, got some bfast tacos, helped the besties dad load up a dresser we didn't want (dump-bound), got snatched up by the bestie and her hubby, and made our way to Seguin! 

Bfast tacos from Tias Taco Hut.

heading out

lunch at the power plant in Seguin, TX. Town motto: it's real.

tastings at the blue lotus winery. Wine and a lot of mead.

meaderita swirl I made. It was AMAZING. We had a LOT of meaderitas. Some time around 630, the drunk man in js brain got loud and we decided we needed pizza! We ordered online at NY pizza pub, then drove there and were WAY early to pick up the pizzas. So, we did what ant rational, drunk humans would do. Sat at the bar and had more drinks! 

Someone, I'm not gonna say WHO, decided we should all have a shot of tequila, but with an orange instead of a lime. It was GOOD. 

Eventually the pizza and garlic knots were ready, so we went back to the condo and had dinner. Then J&D went home, and J and I went to sleep. Sunday we got up, cleaned up  and drove home so that j could go to work. Now i gotta get ready for the week... and the one last thing that's gonna be for his actual bday. 😁 have to save something for the day of, right?? Hehe.

Anyway, I hope all of you are doing well. The haircut is scheduled for Friday, so I'm looking forward to that and then we have another weekend of shenanigans planned. Stay tuned.