I know, I know, it's been a whole month and no blog post! Sorry, sorry... I've been getting into the groove and still trying to figure out how to live here again. I guess you could say that the shiny veneer has worn off and I've been reminded of why I was so happy to get out of here.
Small town America could be a sociologist's dream if we had the ability to accurately track the evolution of a rumor. I've been here for 6 months, the incident happened 2 months ago and the culmination of the rumor was the guy's wife coming to my work to vehemently inform me of his martial status. You remember me telling you about the guy in the drive thru asking for my number, right? Well somehow the story evolved to become I have a thing for this guy and (I'm assuming) didn't care what his actual status was. What makes me laugh is I had a helluva time determining that he was married, but determine I did and (for me) that was the end of it. I haven't seen the guy since. So when his wife came to the store, I was confused. Eventually I understood and thought, tho didn't say, she needed to talk to her hubby more than me. She even brought one of their children as exhibit A. Thankfully the only other people in the store were my co-worker and the other ladies that (again, I'm assuming) she brought in for backup. So the joke has been that I'm the Harlot of Freedom, after everyone's husbands. Sigh... the fact that people have nothing better to do than spread shit around and create drama will never cease to amaze me. In high school I was a lesbian who got pregnant and now I'm a harlot after everyone's husbands. I am grateful that those who know me know better than to listen to the rumors... as for the rest, I will just never understand them.
So I've been processing that particular episode of "Life in Rumortown" and honestly laughing at the absurdity of it. In the meantime I have actually joined Facebook dating as of yesterday. I've gotten 4 chats and apparently over 30 guys have "liked" my profile. So I am at least meeting people the way we do in this day and age. The good thing about the FB dating is that I can case a wide net that does NOT include Riverton and therefore maybe give the rumor mill less to chew on. I say might because we went to Casper on Saturday and saw at least 2 other Riverton people we knew there, so... yeah.
It was a lovely week for going to Casper, though. I was able to have lunch with a dear friend from my K-mart days, which was lovely. We then met up again at Spirit Halloween since her son was looking for a costume. It was a good time. I also got to see my friend C from high school sing. We figured out that it has been about 14 years since I last heard him... that was when he was Don Quixote in Man of La Mancha. The show was great. I also ran into his sister A, who I ended up sitting next to during the show. Afterward we all went to the saloon at their hotel for drinks and catching up. It was nice to be able to talk to people who had also moved away and moved back. I teased C a bit for not getting in touch more since he knew I was back and he said that I had seemed happy enough. The thing is, when he saw me that day at work he was right. I think I had just passed the FSOT and thought that I'd be working for the state dept within a year or so. Now I'm not so sure that's in the cards, I'm somewhat confused as to my direction in life, and a voice in my head is telling me to stay with Mom until my student loans are paid off. That would make financial sense... after all, my bills will never be lower than they are now. I just don't know... I will figure it out, don't worry.
I guess when I'm dealing with all this kind of uncertainty I prefer to keep it to myself. No offense to anyone, but I'm not looking for any advice... I know I need to trust God and make my plans but be open to change and put myself out there on Indeed and LinkedIn and all the other gobbledygook people usually say in these situations. I've also been dipping my toe in the dating pool and I've always preferred to keep that part of my life private. I only mentioned E on here because I thought we were kinda serious... now I'm thinking of not mentioning ANYONE until there's jewelry involved. The fallout of being ghosted by E on top of losing my stepdad sucked. What sucked even more was how people reacted to my sadness. I got a lot of 'get over it' and 'we need you better' and 'what's the big deal, you knew it could all be BS' and believe it or not, none of that really helped the matter. I had been told for years that I needed to feel my feelings... then I did and was told I was doing it wrong! I'm sure people meant well, but I really didn't need the extra pressure to be 'ok' ASAP.
I think that brings you up to speed. Work is work... some days are better than others. I'm in super bitchy mode today mostly due to hormones. I went to see Dune with my friend J last night, which was quite fun. The Acme theater is way different than I remember. Such comfy seats!! This is the same J that I usually have lunch with, so I had joked that we were taking our friendship to a new level. We may become theater buddies. LOL. He was super into it (has read all the books) and was frustrated with a woman to his left who was on her phone the WHOLE TIME. Talk about RUDE. The weather has officially gotten cold... I hate when it's the same as my age. Sigh. Mom and I have figured out the stove, so between the heat and blankets we are pretty toasty. We are planning some fun weekends in Nov, so I'm looking forward to those.
I'm coming to accept that my time back in Riverton may be longer than I had originally planned, so I'm trying to figure out how to live here and maintain my sanity. I think a general policy of non-involvement and a dating radius of more than 30 mins will be a good start. I am excited to hang out with C and A more often now that we've all exchanged phone numbers, and who knows, maybe FB dating will be good for me. Can't hurt to try, right? Much love, dear readers.... and sorry it's been so long, AL. ;)
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